Medicine — worst jokes

- Doctor, Doctor I've got wind! Can you give me something?

- Yes - here's a kite!

- Doctor, Doctor I think I'm suffering from Deja Vu!

- Didn't I see you yesterday?

- Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a bell?

- Take these and if it doesn't help give me a ring!

- Doctor, Doctor my son has swallowed my pen, what should I do?

- Use a pencil till I get there

How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb?
→ Just one, but it takes the entire emergency room to get it out!

What's the difference between getting a divorce and getting circumcised?
→ When you get a divorce, you get rid of the whole prick!

The blonde was at the blood bank and sold a pint of blood. As she was leaving counting her $25, a man was leaving counting his money. He had $40. She asked if he had some rare blood type that he got more than she did. He said no, that he had donated sperm. The next day the bimbo was back at the blood bank. The receptionist asked if she was there to donate blood. The blonde could only shake her head, as her cheeks were bulging.

Why did the blonde have a hysterectomy?
→ She wanted to stop having grandchildren.

What did the leper say to the hooker?
→ Keep the tip.

Whats the difference between premenstrual tension and BSE?
→ One's mad cow disease, the other's an agricultural problem.