Medicine — worst jokes

- Doctor, Doctor I'm a burglar!

- Have you taken anything for it?

- Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a spider

- What a web of lies!

- Doctor, Doctor my husband smells like fish

- Poor sole!

- Doctor, Doctor I've got bad teeth, foul breath and smelly feet.

- Sounds like you've got Foot and Mouth disease!

- Doctor, Doctor you've taken out my tonsils, my adenoids, my gall bladder, my varicose veins and my appendix, but I still don't feel well.

- That's quite enough out of you!

- Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a caterpillar

- Don't worry you'll soon change!

- Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a nit

- Will you get out of my hair!

- Doctor, Doctor I've a split personality

- Well, you'd better both sit down then!

- Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a dog.

- Sit on the couch and we will talk about it.

- But I'm not allowed up on the couch!

- Doctor, Doctor, some days I feel like a tee-pee and other days I feel like a wig-wam.

- You're too tents.