Christmas Jokes — worst jokes

What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
→ Crisp Cringle.

Why does Santa's sled get such good mileage?
→ Because it has long-distance runners on each side.

If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
→ A subordinate claus.

What nationality is Santa Claus?
→ North Polish.

- Elf: Santa, one of the reindeer swallowed my pencil! What should I do?

- Santa: Use a pen.

What can Santa give away and still keep?
→ A cold.

Last year's Christmas pudding was so awful I threw it in the ocean.
That's probably why the ocean's full of currants!

- Who made this Christmas pudding?

- Our chef. He's a little green man who lives in a toadstool.

- What did he use to make it?

- Elf-raising flour, of course.

- Doctor, Doctor, Father Christmas gives us oranges every Christmas. Now I think I'm turning into an orange!

- Have you tried playing squash?

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?
→ A merry Christmas to ewe