Random joke from this category
All of these pilot and aviation jokes get me to thinking about my first skydiving instructor. During class he would always take the time to answer any of our stupid first-timer questions.
One guy asked, "If our chute doesn't open, and the reserve doesn't open, how long do we have until we hit the ground?"
Our jump master looked at him and in perfect deadpan and answered, "The rest of your life."
What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie?
→ Puff pastry!
What do you call a boxing match between two aardvarks?
→ A snout bout!
Which football team to you need to connect up your computer?
→ Leeds.
A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He decided to stop at the next city he came to, and park somewhere quiet so he could get an hour or two of sleep. As luck would have it, the quiet place he chose happened to be on one of the city's major jogging routes. No sooner had he settled back to snooze when there came a knocking on his window. He looked out and saw a jogger running in place.
"Yes?"
"Excuse me, sir," the jogger said, "do you have the time?" The man looked at the car clock and answered, "8:15". The jogger said thanks and left. The man settled back again, and was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window and another jogger.
"Excuse me, sir, do you have the time?"
"8:25!"
The jogger said thanks and left. Now the man could see other joggers passing by and he knew it was only a matter of time before another one disturbed him. To avoid the problem, he got out a pen and paper and put a sign in his window saying, "I do not know the time!" Once again he settled back to sleep. He was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window.
"Sir, sir? It's 8:45!."
Where do football directors go when they are fed up?
→ The bored room!
Why were the two managers sitting around sketching crockery before the start of the game?
→ It was a cup draw!
Why did the chicken get sent off?
→ For persistent fowl play!
How did the basketball court get wet?
→ The players dribbled all over it!
Where do religious school children practice sports?
→ In the prayground!
