Men Jokes — worst jokes

How do men define a "50/50" relationship?
→ We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.

There were 11 people hanging on to a single rope that suspended them from a helicopter trying to bring them to safety. Ten were men; one was a woman.

They all decided that one person would have to let go because if they didn't, the rope would break and all of them would die.

No one could decide who it should be. Finally the woman gave a really touching speech, saying how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving things up for their husbands and children and giving in to men.

All of the men started clapping.

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
→ Because a woman who can't afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.

How many men does it take to open a beer?
→ None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.

Men are like mini skirts.

If you're not careful, they'll creep up your legs.

Men are like curling irons.

They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.

Men are like high heels.

They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

Men are like bank accounts.

Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest.

Men are like lava lamps.

Fun to look at, but not very bright.

Men are like copiers.

You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.