Kids Jokes — worst jokes

- Karen: Have you noticed that Daddy is getting taller?

- Sharon: No, why?

- Karen: His head is sticking through his hair.

- Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair all down her back.

- Harry: Pity it's not on her head!

Janet came home from school and asked her mother if the aerosol spray in the kitchen was hair lacquer.

- No, - said Mom.

- It's glue.

- I thought so - said Janet.

- I wondered why I couldn't get my hat off today.

- Barber: And how old are you, little man?

- Fred: Eight.

- Barber: And do you want a haircut?

- Fred: Well, I certainly didn't come in for a shave!

- First boy: My dad saw a horrible witch and didn't turn a hair!

- Second boy: I'm not surprised - your dad's bald!

The Sunday School teacher asked if any of the children's parents had quoted from the Bible in the past week. Little Timmy paused, but then spoke up, "My daddy doesn't have any hair on his head. Daddy says that God put hair on everything that he was ashamed of."

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?
→ They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins!

What is a child's favourite type of Halloween candy?
→ Lots a candy.

One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes.

She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said:

- what are you supposed to say sweetheart?

The little girl looks up at the woman and says:

- Twick or Tweat!

The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child:

- Go ahead honey say it just one more time.

Once again the little Angel looks up and says:

- Twick or Tweat!

The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag.

The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says:

- Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my f**king cookies!

Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for the best costume at the Halloween party?
→ Because he just came to pick up his little sister.