Random joke from this category
- Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat?
- Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals!
- Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ask the question?
- Johnny: It's because I saw one on daddy's lettuce, but now it's gone.
- Fisherman: What are you fishing for sonny?
- Boy: I'm not fishing, I'm drowning worms.
Tim once took his small cousin with him while he went fishing: When he returned, he was looking very fed up.
- I'll never do that again - he complained to his Dad.
- Did she frighten off the fish? - enquired Dad.
- No - replied Tim.
- She sat on the bank and ate all my maggots.
The little kid sat on the side of the road with a fishing line down the drain. Feeling sorry for him, and wanting to humor him, a lady gave him 50 cents, and kindly asked:
- How many have you caught?
- You're the tenth this morning - was the reply.
An old lady saw a little boy with a fishing-rod over his shoulder and a jar of tadpoles in his hand walking through the park one Sunday. "Little boy," she called, "don't you know you shouldn't go fishing on a Sunday?" "I'm not going fishing, ma'am," he called back, "I'm going home."
A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father:
- How does this boat float?
The father replied:
- Don't rightly know son.
A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked:
- How do fish breath underwater?
Once again the father replied:
- Don't rightly know son.
A little later the boy asked his father:
- Why is the sky blue?
Again, the father repied:
- Don't rightly know son.
Finally, the boy asked his father:
- Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?
The father replied:
- Of course not, you don't ask questions, you never learn nothin'.
Henry's son, David, burst into the house, crying. His mother asked him what the problem was.
- Daddy and I were fishing, and he hooked a giant fish. Really big. Then, while he was reeling it in, the line busted and the fish got away.
- Now come on, David - his mother said.
- a big boy like you shouldn't be crying about an accident like that. You should have just laughed it off.
- But that's just what I did, mommy.
There was a farmer who raised watermelons.
He was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat watermelons. After some careful thought he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure. So he made up the sign and posted it in the field. The next day the kids show up and they see this sign, it says:
- Warning!! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide.
So the kids run off, make up their own sign and post it next to the sign that the farmer made. The farmer shows up the next week and when he looks over the field he notices that no watermelons are missing but he notices a new sign next to his. He drives up to the sign which read:
- Now there are two.
A farmer in the country has a watermelon patch and upon inspection he discovers that some of the local kids have been helping themselves to a feast.
The farmer thinks of ways to discourage this profit-eating situation.
So he puts up a sign that reads:
- WARNING! ONE OF THESE WATERMELONS CONTAINS CYANIDE!
He smiled smugly as he watched the kids run off the next night without eating any of his melons.
The farmer returns to the watermelon patch a week later to discover that none of the watermelons have been eaten, but finds another sign that reads:
- NOW THERE ARE TWO!
What usually comes after the monster lights the birthday candles?
→ The fire department.
