Kids Jokes — worst jokes

What aftershave do monsters wear?
→ Brute.

What can a monster do that you can't do?
→ Count up to 25 on his fingers.

Why was the big, hairy, two-headed monster top of the class at school?
→ Because two heads are better than one.

Why did the monster paint himself in rainbow colors?
→ Because he wanted to hide in the crayon box.

- Waiter on ocean liner: Would you like the menu, sir?

- Monster: No thanks, just bring me the passenger list.

What happened to Ray when he met the man-eating monster?
→ He became an ex-Ray.

- Mommy monster: Don't eat that uranium.

- Little monster: Why not?

- Mommy monster: You'll get atomic-ache.

- Little monster: Mom, Mom, what's for tea?

- Mother monster: Shut up and get back in the microwave.

- Little monster: Mom, why can't we have dustbins like everyone else?

- Mother monster: Less talking, more eating please.

- Little monster: Mom I've finished. Can I leave the table?

- Mommy monster: Yes, I'll save it for your tea.