Food Jokes — worst jokes

What kind of apple has a short temper?
→ A crab apple.

A Pittsburgh steel worker was driving through northern California's apple country.

He stopped at an orchard and asked the owner, "How much are yer apples?"

"All you can pick for one dollar," said the rancher.

"Okay," said the Pennsylvanian. "I'll take two dollars' worth."

Two girls were having their packed lunch in the school yard. One had an apple and the other said, 'Watch out for worms won't you!'
The first one replied, 'why should I? They can watch out for themselves.'

- Dad, do you like baked apples?

- Yes son, why?

- The orchard's on fire.

If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do?
→ Keeps everyone away.

How do you make an apple turnover?
→ Push it down hill.

What can a whole apple do that half an apple can't do?
→ It can look round.

Once upon a time there were five apples
Which was the cowboy?
→ None - because they were all redskins.

What is red and goes putt, putt, putt?
→ An outboard apple.

How does an apple a day keep the doctor away?
→ When you take careful aim.