Ethnic — worst jokes

Did you hear about the gay Polak?

He slept with women.

A Polak was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued.

His attackers then proceeded to go through his pockets. "You mean you fought like that for 57 cents?" asked one of the muggers incredulously.

"Is that all you wanted?" moaned the Pole. "I thought you were after the $400 in my shoe!"

Why did the Polish couple decide to have only 4 children?
→ They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born in the world today is Chinese.

What did the Polish mother say when her daughter announced that she was pregnant?
→ "Are you sure it's yours?"

Two Polaks are walking down opposite sides of a river when they notice each other. One invites the other one over. "I can't swim", he replies. "Why don't you come over here?"

The other guy says, "I can't swim, either. What are we gonna do?"

First guy says, "Wait! I got a flashlight. I'll turn it on, and you walk across the beam to this side."

The second guy replies, "No way! I'll get half-way across, and you'll turn the flashlight off!"

How did the Polish mother teach her son which way to put his underwear on?
→ Yellow in the front, brown in the back!

Did you hear about the Polish girl who tried to trade her menstrual cycle in on a Honda?

Poland sent its top team of scientists to attend the international science convention, where all the countries of the world gathered to compare their scientific achievements and plans.

The scientists listened to the United States describe how they were another step closer to a cure for cancer, and the Russians were preparing a space ship to go to Saturn, and Germany was inventing a car that runs on water. Soon, it was the Polish scientists' turn to speak.

"Well, we are preparing a space ship to fly to the sun."

This, of course was met with much ridicule.

They were asked how they planned to deal with the sun's extreme heat. "Simple, we're going at night!"

Did you hear about the war between Newfoundland and Nova Scotia?

The Newfies were lobbing hand grenades; the Nova Scotians were pulling the pins and throwing them back.

A Canadian is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm. His friend Doug stops him and asks, "Hey Bob! Whacha get the case of beer for?"

"I got it for my wife, eh." answers Bob.

"Oh!" exclaims Doug, "Good trade!"