Dirty Jokes — worst jokes

Why can't you circumcise Iranians?
→ There's no end to those pricks.

What is every Amish woman's private fantasy?
→ Two Mennonite!

How do Redneck mothers know when their daughters are having their period?
→ Their son's dicks taste funny!

So this Mexican dude was taking a piss on the side of a building and this white dude sees him. After the Mexican is done the white guy asks him, "How come you Mexicans don't wash your hands after you pee?"

And the Mexican guy replies, "Because we Mexicans don't piss in our hands"

A young Jewish couple had only recently set up housekeeping when an unfortunate incident occurred.

Early one morning, the wife, drowsy from bed, went to the toilet for the morning's relief, and neglected to notice that the seat was up.

When she sat, she kept going!

She was just the right size and shape so that she became jammed into the toilet past her waist with her legs sticking straight up in front of her.

She cried for her husband, who rushed in, and for the next hour tried desperately to extricate her.

In this process they removed her sleeping gown, but this only left her naked and still stuck, with a particular part of her anatomy prominently visible between her splayed legs.

Finally, the couple resolved to call a plumber, despite the embarrassing nature of their problem.

When the plumber arrived, the young man let him in, but as they were walking to the bathroom, the young man realized that his wife was exposed in a very compromising and humiliating way.

Thinking fast, he ran ahead of the plumber and placed the first thing he could think of, his yarmulke skull cap, over his wife's exposed privates.

The plumber walked into the bathroom, took one long look, and commented: "Well, I think I can save your wife, buddy, but the Rabbi's a goner."

How do you circumcise a redneck?
→ Kick his sister in the chin.

A Chinese man is making love to his wife. He whispers in her ear, "Baby, I wanna' 69!"

She gives him a strange look and replies, "You want Beef and Broccoli NOW?"

The Frenchman and the Italian were in the woods hunting together when suddenly a voluptuous blonde girl raced across their path, totally nude. "Would I love to eat that? Oui, oui!" the Frenchman said, smacking his lips.

So the Italian shot her.

A Mexican, a black, and a white guy are in a bar having a drink when a good-looking girl comes up to them and says "whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me". So the white guy says "I love liver and cheese." she says "that's not good enough." The black says "I hate liver and cheese", and she says "that's not creative", and then the Mexican says "liver alone cheese mine."

Armando went to his neighbor and asked, "Hey Carlos, do you like a woman who has a beeg stomach steeking oll the way out?"

"No," says Carlos.

Armando asks, "Do you like a woman whose teets hang almost to her knees?"

"No," says Carlos.

"Well, Carlos, would you like a woman whose heeps are so mucho grande?"

"Caramba! No, amigo!" Carlos replied.

"Theen tell me why," asked Armando, "do you keep screwing my wife?"