Random joke from this category
Kowalski and Janzek left Hamtramack and went out in the woods looking for Christmas trees.
They looked all day without any luck.
Near nightfall Kowalski finally said, "Janzek, I'm takin' the next tree we come to, whether it has lights on it or not!"
Three men die in a car accident Christmas Eve. They all find themselves at the pearly gates waiting to enter Heaven. On entering they must present something relating or associated with Christmas.
The first man searches his pocket, and finds some Mistletoe, so he is allowed in.
The second man presents a cracker, so he is also allowed in.
The third man pulls out a pair of stockings.
Confused at this last gesture, St. Peter asks, "How do these represent Christmas?"
"They're Carol's."
What's your dad getting for Christmas?
→ Bald and fat.
What would you get if you crossed Halloween with Christmas?
→ A ghoul Yule!
What will Santa bring your fish this Christmas?
→ A scale letrix!
What did the fireman's wife get for Christmas?
→ A ladder in her stocking!
How is Christmas celebrated in a Jewish home?
→ They put parking meters on the roof!
Did you hear about the Jewish Santa Claus?
→ He comes down the chimney, wakes up the children and says, "Hey kids, do you want to buy some toys?"
How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas?
→ They all gather around their cash registers and sing "What a Friend We Have In Jesus..."
Who do elephants get their christmas presents from?
→ Elephanta Claus!
