Worst jokes

Why do so many fishermen own banjos?
→ They make great anchors!

What is the difference between a banjo and an anchor?
→ You tie a rope to an anchor before you throw it overboard.

What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?
→ A Rolling Stone says:

- hey you, get off of my cloud! - while a Scotsman says:

- Hey McLeod, get off of my ewe!

What did the bagpiper get on his I.Q. test?
→ Drool.

What's the difference between a dead bagpiper in the road and a dead country singer in the road?
→ The country singer may have been on the way to a recording session.

What's the definition of a quarter tone?
→ A bagpiper tuning his drones.

Why do bagpipers leave their cases on their dashboards?
→ So they can park in handicapped zones.

If you were lost in the woods, who would you trust for directions, an in-tune bagpipe player, an out of tune bagpipe player, or Santa Claus?
→ The out of tune bagpipe player.
The other two indicate you have been hallucinating.

What's the difference between a lawnmower and a bagpipe?
→ You can tune the lawnmower, and the owner's neighbors are upset if you borrow the lawnmower and don't return it.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
→ To get away from the bagpipe recital.