Worst jokes

Why did the alien phone home on his mobile?
→ Because it was so ET!

- Willie: I have an awful toothache.

- Tommie: I'd have it taken out if it was mine.

- Willie: Yes, if it was yours, I would, too.

Why didn't the monster use toothpaste?
→ Because he said his teeth weren't loose.

How can you get a set of teeth put in for free?
→ Smack a monster.

Why is a toothless dog like a tree?
→ It has more bark than bite.

Why are vampires like false teeth?
→ They all come out at night.

- Mother: Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?...

- Son: I don't know. The dentist kept it.

Beatrice Lillie (Lady Peel) was once accosted by a haughty old dowager who scrutinized her through her lorgnettes.

"What lovely pearls, dear Beatrice," she maliciously remarked. "Are they real?"

"Yes," nodded Lady Peel.

"Of course," the dowager declared, "you can always tell real pearls by biting them. May I try?"

"Gladly," Lady Peel replied. "But remember, Duchess, you can't tell real pearls with false teeth."

How does Snoop Dogg keep his canine teeth white?
→ BLEEEEEE-YATCH!

What did the tooth say to the dentist?
→ "Fill 'er up!"