Real Pearls

Beatrice Lillie (Lady Peel) was once accosted by a haughty old dowager who scrutinized her through her lorgnettes.

- What lovely pearls, dear Beatrice - she maliciously remarked.

- Are they real?

- Yes - nodded Lady Peel.

- Of course - the dowager declared:

- you can always tell real pearls by biting them. May I try?

- Gladly - Lady Peel replied.

- But remember, Duchess, you can't tell real pearls with false teeth.