Men Jokes — worst jokes

How are men like noodles?
→ They are always in hot water, they lack taste and they need dough.

What does a man consider to be a seven course meal?
→ A hot dog and a six pack.

What's the difference between a man and E.T.?
→ E.T. phoned home.

What's a man idea of helping with the housework?
→ Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.

How many men does it take to make popcorn?
→ Four, one to hold the pot, and three to act macho and shake the stove.

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
→ No one knows, it's never happened.

What do you call a man who opens the car door for you?
→ A chauffeur.

Why do so few men end up in Heaven?
→ They never stop to ask directions.

How are men like carpet tiles?
→ If you lay them properly the first time around, you can walk all over them for the rest of your life.

Why does a man only get half-hour lunch-breaks?
→ So his boss doesn't have to retrain him.