Language Jokes — worst jokes

What time is it when you sit on a pin?
→ Spring time.

What did the Loch Ness Monster say to his friend?
→ Long time no sea.

The young lad had applied for a job, and was asked his full name.
"Aloysius Montmorency Geoghan," he replied.
"How do you spell that?" asked the manager. "Er — sir — er — can't you just put it down without spelling it?"

- First witch: Here's a banana if you can spell it.

- Second witch: I can spell banana. I just don't know when to stop.

- How do you spell wrong?

- R?o?n?g.

- That's wrong.

- That's what you asked for, isn't it?

- School Doctor: Have you ever had trouble with appendicitis?

- Fred: Only when I tried to spell it.

"Please, ma'am! How do you spell ichael?"

The teacher was rather bewildered. "Don't you mean Michael?" she asked. "No, ma'am. I've written the 'M' already."

What do Snowmen call their offspring?
→ Chill-dren.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!"

The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!"

The manager opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda: "A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."

Did you hear about the pub owner who raised a baby rabbit?
→ It was an inn-grown hare!