Dirty Jokes — worst jokes

One day Clinton goes to the bathroom, pulls down his pants, and much to his amazement, he finds a red ring around his penis. So the next day he goes to his physician and the doctor says:

- I cant figure out what it is. So I'll give you some medicine, and if it doesn't work, come back. Ill give you something else.

So clinton takes the perscription and takes the pills as directed and comes back in 2 weeks. The physician then hands him a different prescription and he comes back in 3 weeks this time. Then, instead of giving him a prescription he gives him a small tube-like capsule. The doctor says:

- Rub this around the offending circle and come back tomorrow.

Clinton returns the next day and starts shouting:

- Wow! That stuff was terriffic doc! What was thast concoction? It worked great!

The docter then calmly replied:

- Lipstick remover.

The FBI finally came back with the DNA results.

Clinton was a perfect match.

So was all of Arkansas.

Did you hear the latest theory about Monica Lewinsky?
→ It may never be proven but they think she may be the youngest woman to have ever held the Presidency.

What has four legs and smells like fish?
→ Clinton's desk.

Why does Bill Clinton wear underwear?
→ To keep his ankles warm.

One gay man says to the other, did you hear Newt Gingrich is coming out?

- Really? - the second gay man says:

- that's amazing!

The first gay man says:

- yeah we're lucky, he's only coming out of Congress, would you wanna sleep with him?

How big is Bill Clinton's Penis?
→ Not as big as Hillary's

At a government affair, the wives of four world leaders are chatting about how people refer to a penis in their countries.

The wife of Tony Blair says in England people call it a gentleman, because it stands up when women are entering.

The wife of Boris Yeltsin says in Russia you call it a patriot, because you never know if it will hit you on the front or on the back side.

The wife of Chirac says in France you call it a curtain, because it goes down after the act.

With great resignation, the wife of Clinton says in the USA you call it a rumor, because it goes from mouth to mouth...

Why doesn't Hillary wear short dress?
→ Her balls would show.

What did Clinton say when accused of copying his homework from his girlfriend at Oxford?
→ I did not have textual relations with that woman.