Blonde Jokes — worst jokes

Why do blondes drive BMWs?
→ Because they can spell it.

Whats the difference between a blond and a Mosquito?
→ The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.

Why did the blond get fired from the M&M's Factory?
→ She threw away all the w's.

How did the blond break her leg while raking leaves?
→ She fell out of the tree

How do you get a blonde's eyes to sparkle?
→ Shine a flashlight in her ear.

What do you do when a Blonde throws a grenade at you?
→ Pull the pin and throw it back.

How do you confuse a blond?
→ You don't, they're born that way.

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and then the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip.

She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup and she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is battered against the ground again and again. She is mere moments away from unconsciousness when........ ........the Wal-Mart manager runs out to shut the horse off.

This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card. She asks the clerk if they have any new and different cards -- something unusual. The clerk points her to a new card just in that day -- "Happy Birthday to the Boy who Popped My Cherry."

The blonde replied, "How cool! I'll take the whole box!"

I was shopping at our local supermarket.

When I got to the checkout line, there was a beautiful young blonde ahead of me.

As she placed her groceries on the checkout stand, the bagger asked her, "Paper or plastic?"

"It doesn't matter," she replied, "I'm bisacksual."