Clean Jokes — most viewed jokes

What do you get if you cross a skunk and a balloon?
→ A creature that stinks to high heaven!

What happened to the tiger who took a bath three times a day?
→ After a week he was spotless!

What do you get if you cross Dracula with a snail?
→ The world's slowest vampire.

When did the Gorillas start to picket the cookie factory?
→ The day they started to manufacture animal crackers!

How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?
→ With it's sparrowchute!

Where is Dracula's American office?
→ The Vampire State Building.

How does Dracula keep fit?
→ He plays batminton.

Which operetta make the Gorilla crack up?
→ Nutty Marietta!

We have a tree in our yard, terribly bothered by blight.

We sought professional help and had a tree surgeon come to look at it. In his assessment, he noted that the blight was bad, but he was even more concerned with the deep cracks in the bark.

"In fact," he said, "This tree's bark is worse than its blight!"

How do you get down from an elephant?
→ You don't. You get down from a duck.

Why did the elephant paint himself all different colors?
→ So he could hide in the crayon box.

Why do elephants have wrinkles?
→ Because they are so hard to iron.

Why did the elephant put skates on before he went to bed?
→ Because he wanted to get rolling in the morning.

Why can't an elephant ride a tricycle?
→ Because it doesn't have a thumb to ring the bell.

Why do elephants wear sunglasses?
→ So no one will recognize them.

Why are elephants such poor dancers?
→ Because they have two left feet.

What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence?
→ Time to get a new fence.

Why can't elephants go swimming at the beach?
→ Because they can't keep their trunks up.