Travel Jokes — worst jokes

Hear about the blonde explorer?
→ She bought a piece of sandpaper thinking it was a map of the Sahara Desert.

When a blonde goes to London on a plane, how can you steal her window seat?
→ Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row

One day a blonde, red-head, and a brunette were driving through the desert when all of a sudden their car broke down. They decided they would all walk to civilization.

The red-head said, "I'm going to take water so if I get thirsty I can drink it." Then the brunette said, "I'm going to take some food so if I get hungry I can eat." And then the blonde said "I'm going to take the car door, so if I get hot, I can roll the window down!"

One day 2 blondes decided to drive to Disney Land. When they saw a sign that said 'Disney Land left' they turned around and went home.

Postcard from a blonde: Having a wonderful time. Where am I?

What birds are found in Portugal?
→ Portu-geese!

The hotel we stayed in for our holiday offered bed and board, but it was impossible to say which was the bed and which was the board.

A man walked into a lodge in Yellowstone National Park. 'Can you give me a room and bath?' he asked the clerk.
'I can give you a room,' the clerk said. 'But you'll have to take the bath by yourself!'

- Nick: Can you tell me the way to Bath?

- Rick: I use soap and water, personally.

- Hotel guest: Can you give me a room and a bath, please?

- Porter: I can give you a room, but you'll have to wash yourself.