Kids Jokes — worst jokes

What are baby witches called?
→ Halloweenies.

How did the witch almost lose her baby?
→ She didn't take it far enough into the woods.

Which is the only day you are safe in a cannibal village?
→ Sitterdays (when they eat the baby-sitter instead).

What is a baby bee?
→ A little humbug.

What would you get if you crossed a new-born snake with a basketball?
→ A bouncing baby boa.

What do baby pythons play with?
→ Rattle-snakes.

What did the mummy snake say to the crying baby snake?
→ Stop crying and viper your nose.

How did the Mother Banana spoil the Baby Banana?
→ She left him out in the sun too long.

After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother wearily arrived at Rhein-Main Air Base in Germany with my eight siblings and me -- all under age 11.
Collecting our many suitcases, the ten of us entered the cramped customs area. A young customs official watched our entourage in disbelief.

- Ma'am, do all these children and this luggage belong to you? - he said.

- Yes, sir, they're all mine. - my mother said with a sigh.

The customs agent began his interrogation:

- Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or illegal drugs in your possession?

- Sir, if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now. - she calmly answered.

- Little boy to airline pilot: You're a pilot?!?!? That must be exciting.

- Pilot: Not if I do it right.