Dumb Jokes — worst jokes

A customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes to the technician. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with Xeroxed copies of her diskettes.

A technician received a call from a man complaining that the system wouldn't read word processing files from his old diskettes. After trouble-shooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the customer labeled the diskettes then rolled them into his typewriter to type the labels.

Technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.

Computers manufacturer is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.

While trying to diagnose a problem over the phone I told the user to type out his autoexec.bat file.

He said it said "File not found".

I told him to do a dir.

I asked him if he saw autoexec.bat listed.

He said, "Well it says autoexec, then there's some spaces, but no dot, and then it says bat."

I said type this in "type autoexec.bat".

Again he got "File not found".

I asked him to tell me exactly what he typed.

He said, "I typed just what you told me: `type autoexecdotbat'.

A person turned on the computer without a keyboard plugged in.

When she turns on the computer, the computer finds out that there is no keyboard attached and it gives a "Keyboard Error" message.

She then asks "Why did it give me a keyboard error?

There isn't even a keyboard attached?

Sherlock Holmes and Matthew Watson were on a camping and hiking trip. They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said, "Watson, look up. What do you see?"

- Well, I see thousands of stars.

- And what does that mean to you?

- Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?

- To me, it means someone has stolen our tent.

- Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is?

- Pupil: I expect it's around Hadrian's garden miss!

- Teacher: What's 2 and 2?

- Pupil: 4

- Teacher: That's good.

- Pupil: Good?, that's perfect!

Crazy Aunt Maud received a letter one morning, and upon reading it burst into floods of tears.
"What's the matter?" asked her companion.
"Oh dear," sobbed Auntie, "It's my favorite nephew. He's got three feet."
"Three feet?" exclaimed her friend.
"Surely that's not possible?"
"Well," said Auntie, "his mother's just written to tell me he's grown another foot !"