Business Jokes — worst jokes

What does an accountant say when you ask him the time?
→ It's 9.18 am and 12 seconds; no wait - 13 seconds, no wait - 14 seconds, no wait......

What's the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do?
→ Go into town and gang-audit someone.

What's the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do?
→ Go into town and gang-audit someone.

How do you drive an accountant completely insane?
→ Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him and fold up a road map the wrong way.

What's an accountant's idea of trashing his hotel room?
→ Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.

What's the definition of unlikely?
→ A photo-spread in Playboy titled 'The World's Top Accountants - Nude!'.

What do you call an accountant who is seen talking to someone?
→ Popular

What's an extroverted accountant?
→ One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you instead of his own.

What does an accountant use for birth control?
→ His personality.

What do actuaries do to liven up their office party?
→ Invite an accountant.