Worst jokes

What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
→ Pregnant!

How do you make a blonde's eyes shine bright?
→ Shine a torch in her ear!

How do you make a blonde laugh on a Wednesday?
→ Tell her a joke on a Monday!

Did you hear about the blonde tap dancer?
→ She fell in the sink!

A blonde once shot an arrow into the air... but missed!

Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton?
→ It said "concentrate" on it!

Why did the blonde burn her ear?
→ The phone rang while she was ironing!

Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
→ She didn't want to wake the sleeping tablets!

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette.

When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.

After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought:

- Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!

She got out and walked over to the farmer and said:

- If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?

The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.

The blonde looked at the flock and guessed:

- 157.

The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car.

Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said:

- If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?

A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump.

Sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said:

- I can't take this, you're my friend.

But the blonde insisted saying:

- No. A bet's a bet.

Then the redhead said:

- Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money.

The blonde replied:

- Well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again!