Worst jokes

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
→ Pregnant

Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?
→ Because they can't even keep two calves together!

What did the blonde's right leg say to the left leg?
→ Nothing. They've never met.

Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
→ Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!

How can you tell if a blonde has been in your refrigerator?
→ By the lipstick on your cucumbers.

Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?
→ She'd just dyed her hair.
→ She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much.

Why do blondes wear their hair up?
→ To catch everything that goes over their heads.

Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
→ You can park in the handicap zone.

What's a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?
→ Hump me Dump me.

A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out:

- GREEN SIDE UP!

In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled:

- GREEN SIDE UP!

The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing. In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled:

- GREEN SIDE UP!

The lady then asked him:

- Why do you keep yelling green side up?

- I'm sorry - came the reply.

- But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.