Kids Jokes — most viewed jokes

How does a vampire enter his house?
→ Through the bat flap.

What can a monster do that you can't do?
→ Count up to 25 on his fingers.

- FIRST MONSTER: I'm going to a party tonight.

- SECOND MONSTER: Oh, are you?

- FIRST MONSTER: Yes, I must go to the graveyard and dig out a few old friends.

Why did your sister jump out the window?
→ Because she wanted to try out her new spring suit

A woman had 8 children, all of them boys. So, one day a magazine sent a journalist to her house for an interview. He asked her about the boys and what their names were; she said 'Kevin'.

'Right', he said, 'what about that blond one over there?'

'Kevin', she said.

'Oh, and the tall one with the freckles?'

'Kevin', she said.

'Well, and the little chubby one with the baseball cap?'

'Kevin', she said.

'Are all your boys called Kevin?' he asked, 'isn't that terribly complicated?'

'Not at all', she said, 'it makes everything very easy, actually. When I shout: Kevin, tea is ready!, they all come. When I say: Kevin, it's time for bed!, they all go to bed.'

'I see. But what if you want only one of them?'

'No problem.' she answers. 'Then I call them by their surnames.'

- Knock! Knock!

- Who's there?

- Rita.

- Rita who?

- Rita book, you might learn something.

- Knock! Knock!

- Who's there?

- Police.

- Police who?

- Police open the door, I'm tired of knocking.

- Knock! Knock!

- Who's there?

- Henrietta.

- Henrietta who?

- Henrietta worm that was in his apple.

- Knock! Knock!

- Who's there?

- Carrie.

- Carrie who?

- Carrie on with what you're doing, I'm at the wrong door.

- Knock! Knock!

- Who's there?

- Anita.

- Anita who?

- Anita drink of water.

- Knock! Knock!

- Who's there?

- Dwain.

- Dwain who?

- Dwain the bathtub, I'm dwrowning.

- Knock Knock!

- Who's there?

- Abel!

- Abel who?

- Abel to see you, ha, ha!

What did the baby owl's parents say when he wanted to go to a party?
→ You're not owld enough.

Why are vampires like false teeth?
→ They all come out at night.

What comes out at night and goes Munch, munch, ouch!
→ A vampire with a rotten tooth.