Lonely Hearts Club
Did you hear about the monster who sent his picture to a lonely hearts club?
→ They sent it back saying they weren't that lonely!
Random joke from this category
Did you hear about the monster who sent his picture to a lonely hearts club?
→ They sent it back saying they weren't that lonely!
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Celeste
- Celeste who?
- Celeste time I lend you money!
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Boyzone
- Boyzone who?
- Boyzone adventures!
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Beaver E
- Beaver E who?
- Beaver E quiet and nobody will find us!
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Ben
- Ben who?
- Ben knocking on this door all morning!
- Knock Knock!
- Who's there?
- Allegra!
- Allegra who?
- Allegra is broken!
- Knock Knock!
- Who's there?
- Adelia!
- Adelia who?
- Adelia the cards after you cut the pack!
- Barber: And how old are you, little man?
- Fred: Eight.
- Barber: And do you want a haircut?
- Fred: Well, I certainly didn't come in for a shave!
Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
→ He was having a bad hare day!
- One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too.
- No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell .. That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular.
- I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful.
- Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life.
- If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long.
- If you want to be loved by somebody who isn't already in your family, it doesn't hurt to be beautiful.
- It isn't always just how you look. Look at me. I'm handsome like anything and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet.
- Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time.
- Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too.
- Mooshy .. like puppy dogs .. except puppy dogs don't wag their tails nearly as much.
- When a person gets kissed for the first time, they fall down and they don't get up for at least an hour.
- All of a sudden, the people get movies fever so they can sit together in the dark.
- They want to make sure their rings don't fall off because they paid good money for them.
- They are just practicing for when they might have to walk down the aisle someday and do the holy matchimony thing.
- I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'Dinosaurs' is on television.
- Love is foolish .. but I still might try it sometime.
- Yesterday I kissed a girl in a private place .. We were behind a tree.
- Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me.
- I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough.
- Sensitivity don't hurt.
- One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills.
- Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores.
- Shake your hips and hope for the best.
- Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs .. and don't worry if their parents are right there.
- Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love.
- One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me.
- Just see if the man picks up the check. That's how you can tell if he's in love.
- Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold.. Other people care more about the food.
- Romantic adults usually are all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up.
- See if the man has lipstick on his face.
- It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are --- on fire.
- The person is thinking: Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day.
- Some lovers might be real nervous, so they are glad that they finally got it out and said it and now they can go eat.
- I know one reason that kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses.
- You can have a big rehearsal with your Barbie and Ken dolls.
- You learn it right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best of you.
- It might help to watch soap operas all day.
- When they're rich.
- It's never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you. That's why I stopped doing it.
- If it's your mother, you can kiss her anytime. But if it's a new person, you have to ask permission.
- I look at kissing like this: Kissing is fine if you like it, but it's a free country and nobody should be forced to do it.
- Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work.
- Don't forget your wife's name .. That will mess up the love.
- Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash.
- Don't say you love somebody and then change your mind .. Love isn't like picking what movie you want to watch.