Instrument Jokes — most viewed jokes

What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a Wagnerian Tenor?
→ About 10 pounds.

When a 16-inch viola and a 17-inch viola are dropped simultaneously from a 30-story building, which one hits the pavement first?
→ Who cares!

What's musical and handy in a supermarket?
→ A Chopin Liszt.

What is the difference between a trumpet soloist and King Kong?
→ King Kong is more sensitive.

Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: "Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet"

Why shouldn't violists take up mountaineering?
→ Because if they get lost, it takes ages before anyone notices that they're missing.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
→ To get away from the bagpipe recital.

What is the best recording of the Walton viola concerto?
→ Music Minus One.

What is the range of a tuba?
→ Twenty yards if you've got a good arm.

What do lead trumpet players use for birth control?
→ Their personality.