Random joke from this category
A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."
A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."
- Teacher: You're new here aren't you, what's your name?
- Pupil: Fred Mickey Smith
- Teacher: I'll call you Fred Smith then.
- Pupil: My dad won't like that.
- Teacher: Why is that?
- Pupil: He doesn't like people taking the Mickey out of my name!
- Teacher: Is Lapland heavily populated?
- Class: No, there are not many Lapps to the mile!
- Teacher: Name an animal that lives in Lapland!
- Pupil: A reindeer
- Teacher: Good, now name another.
- Class: Another reindeer!
What was King Arthur's favourite game?
→ Knights and crosses!
Once a man went to a resturant and ordered an egg. When it was brought he didn't liked it so he informed the waiter that the egg was bad.
Came the reply:
"I don't lay egg sir I just lay table!"
A man walks into a Chinese restaurant but is told by the Maitre'd that there will be at least a twenty minute wait.
"Would you like to wait in the bar, Sir?", he says.
The man goes into the bar and the bartender says, "What'll it be?"
The man replies, "Give me a Stoli with a twist."
The bartender pauses for a few seconds, then smiles and says, "Once upon time, there were FOUR little peegs . . . "
What language do the Vatican Police speak?
→ Pig Latin!
On the airplane on his way back to Rome, the Pope was doing a crossword puzzle. After a while, he turned the the bishop sitting next to him and said, "What's a four -letter word ending in "unt" which means "woman"?
The bishop said, "Did you try "aunt"?
The Pope said, "Mmmm. Do you have an eraser?"
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?
→ He sold his soul to Santa.
