Clean Jokes — best jokes

Where does a 200 ton elephant sit?
→ Anywhere he wants!

Why did the Turtle cross the road?
→ To get to the shell station.

Why did the Siamese twins move to England?
→ So the other one could drive.

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
→ Frost-bite!

How do you spell relief?
→ F A R T

What's the difference between a duck?
→ One of it's legs is both the same. (just say it to confuse people)

Did you hear?

The Energizer bunny has been arrested for Battery.

How do you put six elephants in a Volkswagen?...
→ Three in front and three in back...

Good question...

Do dogs have fleas, or do fleas have dogs? hmmmm.

A string walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink.

The bartender replies "I'm sorry, We don't serve strings"

The string, angry, runs to the bathroom and ties himself up into knots until his ends are frayed.

Then he walks back out and asks the bartender for a drink.

"Hey, aren't you the string I just talked to?" The bartender asks.

"Nope," Says the string, "I'm afraid not." (a frayed knot)