Language Jokes — worst jokes

A popular whore house was visited by a lesbian. The lesbian requested a 15 year old, and the madam replied, "I'm sorry, we don't serve minors to lickers."

An old man and an old lady are getting ready for bed one night when all of a sudden the woman bursts out of the bathroom, flings open her robe and yells: "Super Pussy!"

The old man says: "I'll have the soup."

whats the differance between a camera and a sock???
→ A camera takes photos and a sock takes 5 toes...

When an ape visits his tailor, what kind of a suit does he order?
→ A zoo-t suit!

What did the Hollywood producer say to the Apes in the zoo when they refused to sign contracts to appear in his new film?
→ Stop playing it cagey!

The Crist family worked at a zoo. Each year they predicted the general luck and overall mood of the year by watching the the gnu. If the gnu's ears were forward, that meant a successful, joyous year was almost certain to happen. But if his ears were laid back flat against his head, it meant that an unlucky or very unhappy year was sure to come. One year it was young Mary's turn to "survey" the animal and come up with the prediction. It was her first time solo, and in her excitement, she forgot to take the key to the cage. She was late in coming to check on the gnu.
Well, she saw the wrong ear position and predicted a bad year, when in fact it was quite good. To explain the error, the local newspaper ran the following headline a year later: MARY CRIST MISSES AN HAPPY GNU'S EAR!

What do you call a woman that people sit on?
→ Cher!

What kind of witch goes to the beach?
→ Sandwitch

Did you hear about the witch who went in for the lovely legs competition?
→ She was beaten by the microphone stand.

Who went into a witche's den and came out alive?
→ The witch!