Aviation Jokes — worst jokes

How do you know you're flying over Poland?
→ Toilet paper hanging on the clotheslines.

What do you get if you cross a giraffe with a dog?
→ An animal that barks at low flying aircraft!

What do you get if you cross a dog with Concorde?
→ A jet setter!

A man got on a plane and sat next to a blonde, after sitting for awhile she sneezed, took out a tissue and whipped her box. The man not knowing her said nothing and went about his business. After about 3 or 4 minutes she sneezed again and, the same thing, whipped her box. Finally, the man got the nerve and asked "what was wrong?" She said that every time she sneezes she has an orgasm. "Oh!" the man said, are you taking anything for it?

"Yes", she said - "black pepper!"

What's the ultimate embarrassment for a blonde?
→ When her ben-wa balls set off the airport metal detector.

They now have an Italian airline that flies out of Genoa.

It's called Genitalia.

A man goes skydiving for the first time. After listening to the instructor for what seems like days, he is ready to go. Excited, he jumps out of the airplane.
About five seconds later, he pulls the ripcord. Nothing happens. He tries again.
Still nothing. He starts to panic, but remembers his back-up chute. He pulls that cord. Nothing happens. He frantically begins pulling both cords, but to no avail.

Suddenly, he looks down and he can't believe his eyes. Another man is in the air with him, but this guy is going up! Just as the other guy passes by, the skydiver - by this time scared out of his wits - yells, "Hey, do you know anything about skydiving?"

The other guy yells back, "Fuck no! Do you know anything about lighting gas stoves?"

When a plane caught fire over the jungle the pilot ejected and landed in a cannibal's pot. The cannibal turned to his friend and said, 'What's this flier doing in my soup?'

Parachute Jumping by Hugo Furst

How can you steal the window seat of a blonde on a plane going to London?
→ Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.