Sport Jokes — most viewed jokes

What did they say about the burger who went skiing for the first time?
→ How the meaty have fallen!

Did you hear about the underwater snooker player?
→ He was a pool shark!

I was given the ultimatum 3 weeks ago. She said "it's me or your fishing."

Gee I miss her.

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time.

After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game.

"Oh, I really liked it," she said, "but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents."

"What on earth do you mean???"

"Well I saw them flip a coin and one team got it and then for the rest of the game all they kept screaming was:

Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!

Why do artists never win when they play football?
→ They keep drawing!

Did you hear about the stupid water-polo player?
His horse drowned . . .

Have you seen the new fishing website?
→ No, it's not online yet.

When young Jose, newly arrived in the United States, made his first trip to Yankee Stadium, there were no tickets left for sale. Touched by his disappointment, a friendly ticket salesman found him a perch near the American flag. Later, Jose wrote home enthusiastically about his experience. "And the Americans, they are so friendly!" he concluded. "Before the game started, they all stood up and looked at me and sang, .... 'Jose, can you see?'"

A new arrival in Hell was brought before the devil. The devil told his demon to put the man to work on a rock pile with a 20-pound sledge hammer in 95 degree heat with 95% humidity.

At the end of the day, the devil went to see how the man was doing, only to find him smiling and singing as he pounded rocks. The man explained that the heat and hard labor were very similar to those on his beloved farm back in Georgia.

The devil told his demon to turn up the heat to 120 degrees, with 100% humidity. At the end of the next day, the devil again checked on the new man, and found him still happy to be sweating and straining. The man explained that it felt like the old days, when he had to clean out his silo in the middle of August on his beloved farm back in Georgia.

At that, the devil told his demon to lower the temperature for this man to -20 degrees with a 40 mph wind. At the end of the next day, the devil was confident that he would find the man miserable. But, the man was instead singing louder than ever, twirling the sledge hammer like a baton. When the devil asked him why, he was so happy, the man answered, "Cold day in hell, the Falcons must be in the SuperBowl!"

Do you know why the Cincinnati Bengals were the last NFL team to get a website?

Because they couldnt put three W's in a row.