Sport Jokes — most viewed jokes

Why didn't the dog want to play football?
→ It was a boxer!

Why do people leave letters at the football ground?
→ They want to catch the last goal-post!

Why is a racehorse like a letter?
→ They both begin a trip at the post!

Pat Williams, general manager of the Orlando Magic, on his team's woeful record:

"We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play."

What is black and white and black and white and black and white?
→ A Newcastle fan rolling down a hill!

What happens if you play tabletennis with a bad egg?
→ First it goes ping, then it goes pong.

How many fishermen does it take to change a light bulb?
→ One, but you should have seen the bulb, it must have been THIS big.

What is the only breed of dog a boxer is afraid of?
→ A Doberman puncher!

A burglary was recently committed at West Ham's ground and the entire contents of the trophy room were stolen. The police are looking for a man with a claret + blue carpet.

The seven dwarves are down in the mines when there is a cave-in. Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them. In the distance a voice shouts out "Charlton are good enough to win the European Cup." Snow White says "Well at least Dopey's alive!"

How does Stan Collymore change a lightbulb?
→ He holds it in the air, and the world revolves around him

The Fire brigade phones George Graham in the early hours of Sunday morning. "Mr Graham sir, White Hart Lane is on fire!" "The cups man! Save the cups!" cries George. "Uh, the fire hasn't spread to the canteen yet, sir."

Apparently, Harry Redknapp offered to send the West Ham squad on an expenses paid holiday to Florida but they said they'd rather go to Blackpool so they could see what it's like to ride on an open-top bus.

Big Ron was caught speeding on his way to the City Ground today. "I'll do anything for 3 points", he said when questioned.

The Nottingham Forest Chairman is considering replacing Big Ron with Steve Davis. Explaining this unusual move, he said "we don't just need points now, we need snookers!"

British Rail have decided to start sponsoring Forest. BR think they are a suitable team because of their regular points failures.

Why do goalkeepers spend ages on the Internet?
→ Because they can't stop saving their work.