School — most viewed jokes

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
→ Because his class was so bright!

- Teacher: What's big and yellow and comes in the morning to brighten a mothers day?

- Pupil: The school bus!

- Teacher: You aren't paying attention to me. Are you having trouble hearing?

- Pupil: No, teacher I'm having trouble listening!

Did they play tennis in ancient Egypt?
→ Yes, the bible tells how Joseph served in Pharoah's court!

- Teacher: What came after the stone age and the bronze age?

- Pupil: The sausage!

- Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week, what have you got to say about that?

- Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday!

On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules, saying, "The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anyone caught breaking this rule once will be fined $50."

He continued, "Anyone caught breaking this rule a second time will be fined $150. Being caught a third time will incur a hefty fine of $400. Are there any questions?"

At this point, a male student in the crowd inquired, "How much for a season pass?"

Laugh and the class laughs with you.
But you get detention alone!

- Our teacher talks to herself does yours?

- Yes, but she does't realise it, she thinks we're actually listening!

- Teacher: That's quite a cough you have there, what are you taking for it?

- Pupil: I don't know teacher. What will you give me?