Guest
Two Wooden Heads
What do you call a monster with two wooden heads?
→ Edward Woodward.
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Random joke from this category
Guest
The Safety Match
- Monster: Someone told me Dr Frankenstein invented the safety match.
- Igor: Yes, that was one of his most striking achievements.
Guest
Monster Money
What kind of money do monsters use?
→ Weirdo (weird dough).
Guest
Knock Knock Clinton
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Clinton
- Clinton who?
- Clinton your eye!
Guest
Knock Knock Chocs
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Chocs
- Chocs who?
- Chocs away!
Guest
Knock Knock Aretha
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Aretha
- Aretha who?
- Aretha flowers!
Guest
Knock Knock Anne Boleyn
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Anne Boleyn
- Anne Boleyn who?
- Anne Boleyn alley!
Guest
Knock Knock Anne
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Anne
- Anne who?
- Anne apple just fell on my head!
Guest
Gravol Label
I just bought some Gravol for my kids. It's even called "Gravol for Children". It has dosage information for children 2 to under 6 years, and for children 6 to under 12 years. There is no dosage information for anybody older than 12 years old. But there is the following:
Caution: Do not exceed the recommended dosage. May cause drowsiness. Avoid driving a motor vehicle or performing tasks requiring mental alertness. Avoid alcoholic beverages. Do not take if you have: glaucoma, chronic lung disease, difficulty in urination due to an enlargement of the prostate gland, or if you are pregnant or breast-feeding unless directed by a physician. [and some other cautions not quite so inappropriate]
I had to take it back - my chain smoking, alcoholic, pregnant, car driving 6-year-old daughter couldn't take them!
Guest
Condom Education
A father and his son go into the grocery store when they happen upon the condom aisle. The son asks his father why there are so many different boxes of condoms.
The father replies, "Well, you see that 3 pack? That's for when you're in high school. You have 2 for Friday night and 1 for Saturday night."
The son then asks his father, "Well what's the 6 pack for?" The father replies, "Well, that's for when you're in college. You have 2 for Friday night, 2 for Saturday night, and 2 for Sunday morning."
Then the son asks his father what the 12 pack is for. The father replies, "Well, that's for when you're married... You have one for January, one for February, one for March..."