Guest
Monster In The Basket
Why was the monster sitting in his Easter basket?
→ He was trying to hatch his peanut butter eggs!
Kids Jokes — most viewed jokes
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Random joke from this category
Guest
Frankenstein Quits Boxing
Why did Frankenstein's monster give up boxing?
→ Because he didn't want to spoil his looks.
Guest
What's For Tea
- Little monster: Mom, Mom, what's for tea?
- Mother monster: Shut up and get back in the microwave.
Guest
Rolling Her Eyes
- First monster: That pretty girl over there just rolled her eyes at me.
- Second monster: Well you'd better roll them back to her, she might need them.
Guest
Knock Knock Bhuto
- Knock Knock
- Who's there?
- Bhuto
- Bhuto who?
- Bhuto-n the other foot!
Guest
Alva Knock Knock
- Knock Knock!
- Who's there?
- Alva!
- Alva who?
- Alva heart!
Guest
Albert Knock Knock
- Knock Knock!
- Who's there?
- Albert!
- Albert who?
- Albert you don't know who this is!
Guest
Boy By The Water
- Fisherman: What are you fishing for sonny?
- Boy: I'm not fishing, I'm drowning worms.
Grandpa's Beer
A five year old boy and his grandfather are sitting on the front porch together, when grandpa pulls a beer out of a cooler. The little boy asked, "Grandpa, can I have a beer?"
Grandpa replied, "Can your dick touch your ass?"
The little boy answered no.
Grandpa said "Then you're not man enough to have a beer."
A little later Grandpa lights up a cigar. The little boy asked, "Grandpa, can I have a cigar?" Once again, Grandpa asked, "Can your dick touch your ass?" The little boy answered no, again.
Grandpa said, "Then your not man enough to have a cigar." A little later, the little boy came out of the house With a cookie.
Grandpa asked, "Can I have a cookie?"
The boy asked "Can your dick touch your ass?"
Grandpa replied, "Hell yeah my dick can touch my ass!" The boy replied, "Then go fuck yourself, Grandma made these cookies for me."
Guest
Missing the Train
A mother-in-law visits her son-in-law before leaving for a trip. They are sipping coffee and chatting.
Suddenly, mother-in-law looks at the clock and jumps off her chair exclaiming, "My god! It's already three P.M. I'm about to miss my train!" She begins to put her clothes on in a hurry.
At this moment, the son-in-law's daughter runs up to her and before he can do anything and announces, "Don't hurry, granny! Daddy moved the clock two hours ahead!"