Kids Jokes — most viewed jokes

Why was the big, hairy, two-headed monster top of the class at school?
→ Because two heads are better than one.

Why was the monster standing on his head?
→ He was turning things over in his mind.

A little girl and a little boy were at day care one day. The girl approaches the boy and says:

- Hey Tommy, wanna play house?

He says:

- Sure! What do you want me to do?

The girl replies:

- I want you to communicate your thoughts.

- Communicate my thoughts? - said a bewildered Tommy.

- I have no idea what that means.

The little girl smirks and says:

- Perfect. You can be the husband.

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Bernie

- Bernie who?

- Bernie bridges!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Bab

- Bab who?

- Bab Boone is a real ape!

- Knock Knock!

- Who's there?

- Amazon!

- Amazon who?

- Amazon of a gun!

How can you tell if a monster has a glass eye?
→ When it comes out in conversation.

Did you hear about the Irish monster who went to night school to learn to read in the dark?

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Amin

- Amin who?

- Amin man!

- Knock Knock!

- Who's there?

- Acis!

- Acis who?

- Acis spades!