Kids Jokes — most viewed jokes

Is there a mouse in the house?
→ No, but there's a moose on the loose!

- Waiter on ocean liner: Would you like the menu, sir?

- Monster: No thanks, just bring me the passenger list.

Why are diapers like $10 bills?
→ Because you have to change them.

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Butcher

- Butcher who?

- Butcher your arms around me!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Austen

- Austen who?

- Austen-tentatiously well off!

- Knock Knock!

- Who's there?

- Algy!

- Algy who?

- Algy-bra!

Why were the Scouts so tired on April 1?
→ Because they had just finished a 31 day March!

About two weeks before Christmas, a little Catholic boy decided to write a letter to Santa. He started "Dear Santa...", he thought "No, I will go to a higher authority", so he decided to write a letter to Jesus.

"Dear Jesus, If you get me a bike for Christmas, I will be good for two weeks.."

"NO NO NO NO I can't be good for two weeks", he thought to himself.

So he started all over again...

"Dear Jesus, If you get me a bike for Christmas I will be good for one week."

"NO NO NO NO I can't be good for one week", he thought to himself.

So he quickly ran to the Study room and grabbed their statue of Mary, and quickly wrapped it up in a blanket.

He started all over again.

"Dear Jesus, I have your mother...if you ever want to see her again...get me a bike for Christmas!"

When do clocks die?
→ When their time is up.

Why didn't the monster use toothpaste?
→ Because he said his teeth weren't loose.