Clean Jokes — most viewed jokes

What do you call an ant who lives with your great uncle?
→ Your great-ant!

Who was the most famous ant scientist?
→ Albert Antstein!

What games to ants play with elephants?
→ Squash!

What do you call a 100 year old ant?
→ An antique!

What kind of ant can you colour with?
→ A crayant!

Who is the most famous French ant?
→ Napoleant!

Why did the ant-elope?
→ Nobody gnu!

What is the biggest ant in the world?
→ An elephant!

Why don't anteaters get sick?
→ Because they are full of antibodies!

What do you call an ant who likes to be alone?
→ An independant!

How do you hire a teddy bear?
→ Put him on stilts!

What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle?
→ A polo bear!

Why do polo bears like bald men?
→ Because they have a great, white, bear place!

What do polo bears have for lunch?
→ Ice burger!

What's a teddy bears favorite pasta?
→ Tagliateddy!

What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
→ They both have 'the' as their middle names!

Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet?
→ It lives on ice!

Why shouldn't you take a bear to the zoo?
→ Because they'd rather go to the cinema!

What is a bear's favorite drink?
→ Koka-Koala!

Why was the little bear so spoiled?
→ Because its mother panda'd to its every whim!

Why did the mirror cross the road?
→ To see itself!!

Who is the bees favorite singer?
→ Sting!

Who is the bees favorite pop group?
→ The bee gees!

What do you get if you cross a bee with a skunk?
→ An animal that stinks and stings!

What does a queen bee do when she burps?
→ Issues a royal pardon!

How does a queen bee get around her hive?
→ She's throne!

What does the bee Santa Claus say?
→ Ho hum hum!

Why do bees hum?
→ Because they've forgotten the words!

What kind of bees hum and drop things?
→ A fumble bee!

What did the bee say to the flower?
→ Hello honey!

What's a bees favorite flower?
→ A bee-gonias!

Why did the queen bee kick out all of the other bees?
→ Because they kept droning on and on!

What do you call a bee born in May?
→ A maybe!

What kind of bee can't be understood?
→ A mumble bee!

Where do bees keep their money?
→ In a honey box!

What TV station do bees watch?
→ Bee bee c one!

What did the bee say to the naughty bee?
→ Bee-hive yourself!

Why did the bees go on strike?
→ Because they wanted more honey and shorter working flowers!

Why do bees have sticky hair?
→ Beacuse of the honey combs!

What is black and yellow and buzzes along at 30,000 feet?
→ A bee is an aeroplane!

What does a bee get at McDonalds?
→ A humburger!

What buzzes, is black and yellow and goes along the bottom of the sea?
→ A bee in a submarine!

What's more dangerous than being with a fool?
→ Fooling with a bee!

What did the spider say to the bee?
→ Your honey or your life!

Who is a bee's favorite painter?
→ Pablo Beecasso!

What did the bee to the other bee in summer?
→ Swarm here isn't it!

What is a bee's favorite classical music composer?
→ Bee-thoven!

Who writes books for little bees?
→ Bee-trix Potter!

Where do bees go on holiday?
→ Stingapore!

What do you call a bee who's had a spell put on him?
→ He's bee-witched!

Why do bees buzz?
→ Because they can't whistle!

Can bees fly in the rain?
→ Not without their little yellow jackets!

Why did the bee started talking poetry?
→ He was waxing lyrical!

What goes zzub, zzub?
→ A bee flying backwards!

What are the cleverest bees?
→ Spelling bees!

What bee is good for your health?
→ Vitamin bee!

What's a bees favorite novel?
→ The Great Gats-bee!

What do you get if you cross a bee with a door bell?
→ A hum dinger!

How many bees do you need in a bee choir?
→ A humdred!

Where do ants go to eat?
→ At a restaurant!

What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
→ Antteneye!

What do you call an ant with frogs legs?
→ An antphibian!

What kind of ants are very learned?
→ Pedants!

What do you call a smart ant?
→ Elegant!

What do you call an ant who can't play the piano?
→ Discordant!

What kind of ant is good at maths?
→ An accountant!

How many ants are needed to fill an apartment?
→ Ten ants!

- Knock, knock!

- Who's there?

- George Washington!

- George Washington who?

- George Washington who? Didn't you learn anything in history class?

Why is the snail the strongest animal?
→ Because he carries a house on his back!