Christmas Jokes — most viewed jokes

What nationality is Santa Claus?
→ North Polish.

- Who made this Christmas pudding?

- Our chef. He's a little green man who lives in a toadstool.

- What did he use to make it?

- Elf-raising flour, of course.

What do you call a man who claps at Christmas?
→ Santapplause!

What does Father Christmas call that reindeer with no eyes?
→ No-eyed-deer!

Why does Father Christmas like to work in the garden?
→ Because he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe

Did you hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gamble?
Its true....

Comet cleans sinks!

What's the most popular wine at Christmas?
→ "I don't like sprouts!"

What can Santa give away and still keep?
→ A cold.

- My problem is that I keep stealing things when I go Christmas shopping. Can you give me something for it!

- Doctor: Try this medicine...and if it doesn't work come back and bring me a new video camera.

- Father Christmas: What's your favourite Christmas story?

- Elf: The one where the three creatures are scared of the Big Bad Wolf and they grow on trees!

- Father Christmas: You mean 'The Three Little Figs'.