Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

Why was the frog down in the mouth?
→ He was un hoppy!

Why was the moth so unpopular?
→ He kept picking holes in everything!

Fred's class was taken to the Natural History Museum in New York.

- Did you enjoy yourself? - asked her mother when she got home.

- Oh, yes - replied Fred - But it was funny going to a dead zoo.

There were two cows in a paddock, enjoying the sun and eating some grass. The first cow said:

- Moo.

And the second cow said:

- That's funny, I was just about to say that.

How do you know if you have a tough mosquito?
→ You slap him and he slaps you back!

A little turtle begins to climb a tree slowly. After long hours of effort, he reaches the top, jumps into the air waving his front legs, until reaches heavily into the ground with a hard knock over his shell.

After recovering his consciousness, he starts to climb the tree again, jumps again, and knocks the ground heavily again.

The little turtle insisted again and again after each knock, while a couple of birds sitting at the edge of a branch, looking the turtle with pain.. suddenly the female bird says to the male:

- Hey dear, I think it's time to tell our little turtle he is adopted.

What is small, furry and brilliant at sword fights?
→ A mouseketeer!

How do you save a drowning mouse?
→ Use mouse to mouse resuscitation!

Why did the Irishman buy two tickets to the zoo?
→ One to get in and one to get out.

Did you hear about the cannibal spider that ate his uncle's wife?
→ He was an aunteater.