Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

What's a snakes favourite flower?
→ Coily-flowers!

What's the fastest way to send a rabbit?
→ Haremail.

What goes "knio, knio?"
→ A backward pig.

An actor went to see a new agent one day and said:

- You must have a look at my act, it really is innovative.

So saying, he flew up to the ceiling, circled the room a few times and landed smoothly on the agent's desk.

- So you do bird impressions - said the agent:

- what else can you do?

What do you get if cross a mouse with a packet of washing up powder?
→ Bubble and squeak!

What are crisp, like milk and go 'eek, eek, eek' when you eat them?
→ Mice Krispies!

What kind of letters did the snake get from his admirers?
→ Fang mail.

One ant was running across an unopened box of crackers and urging another to speed up.

- But why do we have to hurry? - said one.

- Can you read, you nut! It says, 'Tear along the dotted line'.

How do stones stop moths eating your clothes?
→ Because rolling stones gather no moths!

How do we know that insects are so clever?
→ Because they always know when your eating outside!