Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

One day a man drove by a farm and saw a three-legged pig. The man went up to the farmer and said:

- Excuse me sir, but why does that pig only have 3 legs?

- Well - said the farmer - that there pig is very special. One time my wife was cooking something she stepped out of the kitchen and it caught on fire. No one in the house knew about it but the pig and he saved me, my wife, and my 2 kids.

- That's amazing sir but why does that pig onlly have three legs? - said the man.

- Then there was that time the pig saw a big storm coming and we didn't. The pig ran into the house and dragged us out to the storm cellar. If it weren't for that pig we would all be dead.

- But still, that doesn't explain why the pig only has 3 legs.

- And I remember the time my youngest son was stuck up in a tree but I was too far away to hear him scream. The pig came running towards me and led me to where he was.

- Well, that is miracle but how come that pig only has 3 legs? - the man said quite annoyed at this point.

- Well - said the farmer - with a pig that special...you have to eat 'em real slow.

What did the bumble bee striker say?
→ Hive scored!

Why should you never invite a pig to join your tug-of-war team?
→ Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.

What dog has money?
→ A bloodhound, because he is always picking up scents (cents).

What is Iraq's national bird?
→ Duck

Did you hear about the bear hunter?

Well, he was out hunting for bears one day, and soon came across a large, trophy sized bear. He raised his rifle and took careful aim. Just as he was about to pull the trigger, the bear turned and began to speak to him!

- Isn't it better to talk than to shoot? What do you want? Let's negotiate the matter - said the bear.

Lowering his rifle in shock, the hunter thought a second, and then replied:

- I want a fur coat.

How to elephants talk to each other?
→ By 'elephone!

What kind of dog can tell time?
→ A clockshund!

Why did the dog's owner think his dog was a great mathematician?
→ When he asked the dog what six minus six was, the dog said nothing.

What did the dog use to make his kite?
→ Flypaper.