Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

How do you stop a dog smelling?
→ Put a peg on it's nose!

- Doctor, Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a caterpillar.

- Don't worry, you'll soon change!

How does a blonde kill a fish?
→ She drowns it.

A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a new litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother:

- There were two boy kittens and two girl kittens.

- How did you know that? - his mother asked.

- Daddy picked them up and looked underneath - he replied.

- I think it's printed on the bottom!

When do rabbits have buck teeth?
→ When their parents won't get them braces.

What's a rabbits' favorite song?
→ "Hoppy Birthday to You."

Why did the piglets get in trouble in their biology class?
→ They ate all the specimens.

What did the pig say when his brother rolled on him?
→ Heavy!

How do you take a pig to hospital?
→ By hambulance!

What do you get if you cross a bird with a monstrous snarl?
→ A budgerigrrrrr!