Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

Why didn't the Bionic Pig get a TV series of his own?
→ He made the mistake of going to a barbecue with the Bionic Man and the Bionic Woman.

- Who gave the Liberty Bell to Philadelphia?

- Must have been a duck family.

- A duck family?

- Didn't you say there was a quack in it!

What excuse does an Ape give for abducting a pretty girl?
→ I can't help it - she brings out the beast in me!

Do Apes kiss?
→ Yes, but never on the first date!

Why are fish boots the warmest ones to wear?
→ Because they have electric 'eels!

What is dry on the outside, filled with water and blows up buildings?
→ A fish tank!

Why do elephants live in the jungle?
→ Because it's out of the high rent district.

- My dog is great at math.

- Really?

- Ask him how much is two minus two.

- But two minus two is nothing!

- That's what he'll answer, nothing!

When is a dog most impolite?
→ When he points.

What kind of dog chases anything red?
→ A bull dog!