Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

The Untamed Tiger by Claudia Armoff

What do you call a bunch of chickens playing hide-and-seek?
→ Fowl play!

What is green and pecks on trees?
→ Woody Wood Pickle!

A woman, while touring a small South American country, was shown a bullfight. The guide told her:

- This is our number one sport.

The horrified woman said:

- Isn't that revolting?

- No - the guide replied.

- revolting is our number two sport.

What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a millionaire?
→ A bunny with money.

Why wouldn't the piglet's mother let her read romantic novels?
→ She was afraid her daughter would run away with a wolf.

Why did the little pig try to join the Navy?
→ He loved to sing:

- Oinkers Aweight

Why did the little pig hide the soap?
→ He heard the farmer yell:

- Hogwash!

What did the pig say when the wolf grabbed her tail?
→ That's the end of me!

Once there was a millionaire who had a collection of live alligators. He kept them in a pool at the back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day, he decides to throw a huge party. During the party he announces:

- My dear guests, I have a proposition to every man here.

- I will give one million dollars or my daughter to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!

As soon as he finishes his last word, there is the sound of a large splash. The guests all turn to see a man in the pool swimming as fast as he can. They cheer him on as he keeps stroking. Finally, the swimming man makes it to the other side unharmed. The millionaire is so impressed, he says:

- My boy, that was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it could be done! Well, I must keep my end of the bargain. Which do you want, my daughter or the one million dollars?

The man says:

- Listen, I don't want your money. I don't want your daughter, either. I want the person who pushed me in that water!