Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

What would happen if pigs went on strike?
→ They'd form pigget lines.

What do you get when you cross a pig with a canary?
→ I don't know, but when it sits on your electric wire and sings, all your lights go out

What do little piglets do on a Saturday night?
→ Have a pigjama party!

What did the pig say when it found a fly in its soup?
→ Yum Yum.

What do you get from a bee that has an udder?
→ Milk and honey.

Why did the elephant eat the candle?
→ He wanted a light snack!

When you catch your dog eating a dictionary, what should you do?
→ Take the words right out of his mouth.

Good news! I've been given a goldfish for my birthday...
the bad news is that I don't get the bowl until my next birthday!

What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
→ A brick-layer!

Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road when she sees the Big Bad Wolf crouched down behind a log.

- My, what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf - says Little Red Riding Hood.

The surprised wolf jumps up and runs away!

Further down the road, Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again-this time he is crouched behind a tree stump.

- My what big ears you have Mr. Wolf - says Little Red Riding Hood.

Again the foiled wolf jumps up and runs away!

About two miles down the track, Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again, this time crouched down behind a road sign.

- My, what big teeth you have Mr. Wolf - taunts Little Red Riding Hood.

With that, the Big Bad Wolf jumps up and screams:

- Will you get lost? I'm trying to take a shit!