Most viewed jokes

What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?
→ That hit the spots!

How do you get a dog to stop barking in the back seat of a car?
→ Put him in the front seat.

A young woman went to her doctor complaining of pain.

- Where are you hurting? - asked the doctor.

- You have to help me, I hurt all over - said the woman.

- What do you mean, all over? - asked the doctor.

- be a little more specific.

The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled:

- Ow, that hurts.

Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled:

- Ouch! That hurts, too.

Then she touched her right earlobe:

- Ow, even THAT hurts - she cried.

The doctor checked her thoughtfully for a moment and told her his diagnosis:

- You have a broken finger.

- Dentist: $100.00.

- Patient: $100.00 for just a few minutes work?

- Dentist: Well, I can extract it very slowly if you like.

- Doctor, Doctor I feel like a sheep.

- That's baaaaaaaaaad!

What is a bellybutton for?
→ It gives a blonde a place to park her gum on the way down.

Why did the blonde make love in the microwave?
→ She wanted to have a baby in 9 minutes.

- Policeman: Didn't you hear my siren?

- Motorist: Sure, that's why I sped up.

What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad?
→ One trains the mind, the other minds the train.

Why did the cannibal eat the tightrope walker?
→ He wanted a balanced meal.

How can you help a starving cannibal?
→ Give them a hand!